Looking Back ...I Realize No Looking Back Anymore..!!

So at the verge of another year ahead , I look back at this year as not just one that passed off. This year has a significant impact on my life or me, I would put it that way.I lost the status of being a student anymore by the mid-year and rest of the year was completely new to me,yeah I am saying about the career with its lifespan of 6 months and going on good.

This span of a year started with me following the family jinx of wearing specs.

January 2nd - Boom start to the year, I landed up in a decent software company with the a good pay packet.My first job will remain close to my heart ever.

These were the days when I was glued to G-Chat for hours, working on the goddamn final year project, roaming around Chennai and straying the college campus since I would not have this student status after a while long.Annual Event of my college cultural, Department's techno-meet, late night walks on the platforms of college and more memories that could not be expressed in words will always linger in my heart.

Finally, the last lecture, the last time class-room sitting arrived.Deep inside my heart I was crying thinking of missing my studenthood,friends, college-a place which taught me maturity , responsibility and much more, it even depicted where I stand in a gang of intellects,geeks,enthusiasts,tech-savvies,jovials for that matter even bloopers.
As everybody do, I too made some good friends ,during the later stage of my college era who stood by during all times be it good or bad.The pranks we played on each other,late night fights with rival gang,midnight chai on the roadside,weekend bash at cineplexes,longing for xerox before the day of the exams,the no-worth chats on the college bund,cricket at the cramped space between the hostels,support for things they lent before I could ask ,even for the crushes on the opposite sex and much more which made a stamp of its own remains buried deep in heart longing for the good old days to get back that would never happen still.

The one last time appearing for a semester-exam.The late night studies,last minute brush ups, the stress, hunt for xerox copies for the next exam, examination hall....GOD!!! I am gonna miss this all..These make me to wish I had a rewind button so as to relive the moments I enjoyed the most and even things that I missed.

This is it..!! Everything finally arrives to an end. 21 Years of student-life reached its destiny.There was I , at the gates of the entrance of my college with my stuffs all packed up and for the one last time I turned back to see the college's main road with half-centenary old renowned department buildings on either sides.The road was like a carpet of yellow flowers that shed from the trees beside.That was like a gesture from it bidding adieu to me.Railway Station, Chennai-Egmore.Bags on the side I was texting messages to friends "Good Bye Guys.Don't forget me.Try to realize me when you see me the next time."

The next thing I remember was sitting on the couch of my living room of my home sweet home.After some long time finger licking food from mom's cuisine.My stomach was heavy so was my heart for a patch of time.Time, made me get used to things in the practical world.I had a very short time before I could get into the shoes of a professional.So I decided to visit my teachers in school and the friends of my batch from the school.So I just started gathering my batch for a dinner one last time for the life-time since everybody will have their own goals running towards them,when they will never have time to think of the school or the friends from it.
Then was the day, I was standing with my bunch of friends in front of the gate of the school.There were so many changes in school since I left.The classes were rearranged,some teachers left the school and even the headmaster was replaced.Finally I met my teachers,greeted them with so much love which I haven't expressed to them before when I was in school.I was very much on my feet because they still recognized me even after a brief gap of 4 years.This was one of the defining moment, I would say.That Night,a dinner was arranged on the sides of the beach on the lawn lighted with soothing candle-like lights.With all of them together, I was reminded of the days when we were in the school,sporting uniforms jumping around with no worries.The other defining moment.For a second I had forgotten that I was missing my friends back in college.The group photo again after the dinner.This time at the casual best without the background of the school.

P.S:I confess that I had a little intention of meeting someone from school in particular,in arranging a get-together.Everything has to come to an end,the night faded away to the next dawn of the day.I was gearing up to kickstart my career in Hyderabad.On the day to leave for it, there were my friends at the railway station from school with wishes for the next big step of me in life.Bidding a bye,with heavy heart I left.

The D-day, JUNE 16 - The first day of my professional career, a bit nervous.I had to pass the Microsoft Building to reach my office.The infrastructure of my office was really stunning.New peers from colleges around India ,a big day for them too.We had a very welcome from the HR personnels.And then there was I in the training room with the Employee ID and my salary account opened.I got to know my peers during the brief period of training.It was a different experience totally.Its been a month since then,I was with some peers renting a flat whom from acquaintances turned to be some good pals.At the close of the training ,we had our first official outing to a resort at the outskirts of the city.A good time-pass and chilling feel after some hardcore training stuff.That's it,time to get onto some real work.I was put up in a team of 8 members.It took time to get along with them.But they were really a bunch of software geeks with some good humor.Now I am totally comfortable working along with them.We gel then on quite well.Our vibes are increasing each day.

My First Salary: That is quite a sum of money.I haven't handled so much of money ever before.I was confused what I would or should do with this, so I just transferred them all to my dad's account.Along with salary of the successive month, I bought loads of goodies for everybody in my family starting from my Dad,Mom,Bro,2 Aunties,grandpa and 2 cousin brothers.Obviously that did cost me quite a lot and at the end of the month I was back at square one asking pocket money from Dad.But spending for them is lot more than anything, after all I don't have anybody else to spend on and it's my first penny earned and that moment would not return back.

Now I am in the status of managing my Income Tax.I feel that is quite a great thing.So this year had made its mark on me.An year with so much emotions involved from heavy hearts to lighter moments.From days where we exchanged slam books to now exchanging Design Documents of projects, this has been a transformation to a different frontier.

Looking Back I come to know,I have come a long way and have still much more than the way I reached now to go.The search is still on for something to achieve or arrive at.I don't believe in destiny.What we do now reflects back in a different means.As of now I am living every moment with josh.I hope to continue this spirit as long as I could, if not atleast to the next year.I have realized that everything is bits and pieces of life.I can feel my maturity level high.All that I am seeking to is a great year ahead that would be another remark in everybody's life.I wish that the ecstasy will still continue towards bliss.

What a thought...!!

We realize the importance of things when they are out of reach or hard to acquire..

Criticize Thyself


"Laugh at your mistakes , before others do", that exactly makes one to feel lighter in case of any embarrassing movements whatever the venue or the situations be.That surely shows the other side of having the "Easy go" nature.Taking things lighter always does not burden up the heart and thoughts.

But there is a thin line differentiating the concept of Self Criticism and Inferiority Complex.Overdose of Self Criticism surely leads to inferior feelings.The general feeling is "Every man is his own master, at least we think so".

I believe in this kind of criticism. will lead to some greater heights in terms of character and attitude which one possesses, if not thriving hard to achieve it.

Sexiest Woman Alive in Asia..!

Katrina Kaif , Damsel Queen ruling the roost in Bollywood for the past one year or so.This long legged beauty is sure a great hindrance in the sleep of most youngsters if not at least to me.What makes her so special. I am still in the process of discovery of it.
I remember her, seeing the first time in the movie "Sarkar" just fitting the bill for her role.Ofcourse that is not her first silver screen appearance but that was when I noticed her where then she had a strong english accent to her hindi.For which she was really criticized hardly and I too adhered it that time.Next was "Partner" where she really impressed me with her Barbie doll looks and the most cutest smile I have ever seen.
Then came the racy movie with Saif where with her glam doll image pushed me to the edge.Then on I was really onto her, grasping every shows she was in and reading to some tinsel town news about hers.Indeed she redefined the word "Bubbly" that was predefined by the pretty "Priety Zinta".
From then on she was on my laptop wallpaper,my bedroom poster and even became the first I read about in fashion or film magazines.
But then I had no idea about her relationship with Sallu Bhai.Still I believed that was all bits and pieces of the stardom to be linked up with someone of the opposite sex, until I watched the Karan Johar's coffee table chat where she was partnering Lara Dutta for that episode.She in no way let down Salman Khan for the questions and pranks played at her in the Karan's way.
Whatever may be , my pulse rises and I get beefed up whenever I see her songs, posters ,interviews and promos for her endorsements.In other words I would say I am in pursuit of an impossible love.

I was not so sure of the saying "A door surely opens before one shuts".Yes, I discovered a look-alike Katrina Kaif just very recently whom I have been eyeing for months.I can feel the thousand butterflies on my stomach on the verge to fly.Is this really a side effect of the love bug..? I am really confused...!!

What a thought..!!

"Old is Gold".Think of it..It must have been new on the start...lol...What a thought..!!

My Life Rating

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:
8.2
Mind:
7.6
Body:
8.1
Spirit:
7.5
Friends/Family:
6
Love:
5
Finance:
8.5
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

Just got to know about this meter when I was gazing through the web-pages.

Try it on yourself and just get to know your ratings on Life.

It feels good if something says that your future would be cool and fantastic.Never mind if the ratings you get is under-rated.

"After all Life has to go on, if at all anything happens.."

Words.........


Sometimes i wish that we had no language, no words. Words cause misunderstandings, they hurt, they cause a lot of pain and many a times they are misunderstood..wish we were all mute and conveyed our feelings just by expressions. Dont know whether the world would have been a better place or not but personal relationships would have been much better. Atleast our parents wouldnt have said that u dont know how to talk to elders and friends n lovers wouldnt have had too many fights..even if they had there wont be those hurtful words said in anger, those misunderstandings or just the whole love n respect for each other vanishing in a split second jus cos of a few words. Jus think of small babies, how they express themselves....isnt that wonderful?? jus think of how many times u hv said something to someone in anger n regretted it later.....I know its jus wishful thinking inspite of all the evils that they bring with them,these words do run our life.. if there werent any words..i would hv been pressing d keys of my keyboard rt. nw n u wuldnt be reading this..if there werent any words there would be no literature..no books..no phones...ya it wuld have been impossibl to live without them;-) no blogging, no bloggers, no orkut....on second thougts..we need words guys;-)..................... Well as the age old saying think before you speak otherwise u migt jus lose the person u cherish the most..............

Sometimes I wish I could.........



'Sometimes I Wish I Could Turn Back Time' this phrase from a Backstreet Boys' song really reflects my state of mind right now.Sometimes I have this strange feeling of going back to the past and enjoying my good old days , rectifying some regrets that would have been solved so easily which was prolonged so long even till now.But people say "Whatever happened was for the good and whatever happening and would happen will always be good".Ofcourse this applies for the most of the cases.But thinking of the rest of the few cases where we might have lost a relationship like a good friend because of some misunderstanding,little quarrels and fights that cost something more than what they deserved(in the opposite way).Now that really hurts when thinking of the past.But they say not to be preoccupied with the past and move forward to patch up with the fast paced world.Most of the times its possible maintain this kind of attitude.But it can be really difficult to think this ways when d stakes are too high, when there's too much to lose, when an otherwise trivial mistake has had a catastrophic effect on your life. In such circumstances its really not possible to be practical.

Life would've been so much simpler if we could just press Ctrl Z and undo things which are not to our liking.........But the fact is that life is not as easy as operating a computer(even that isnt so easy)

The Transformers


"The Life" , goes your way until you adopt to situations adjust to certain things, people and when we enact the proverb of "A Roman in Rome". Just have a thought , you being like what you were as in kinder garten now, being moulded in the care of parents, teachers being unaware of lies, adultery. Wow..!! IF the progression of age and years had stopped there , life would have certainly been a heaven.

Now how much transformations did I or everybody undergo..? We describe them in the scale of achievements, progress, lessons learnt, failures faced and even by the pain of girl friend dumping.

Be it from the first time we stand on our feet trying to walk continuously cheered by the parents.This I mean the first transformation to boyhood where we get introduced the concepts of school, learning , teachers even almost everything under the sky I would say. Then onto the adolescent , the phase which marks the character personally and as well academically.And the final stage I am experiencing as of now ,an adult.This has so much of complications in it, where we make the most vital decisions towards the career, the first love ( I meant to say the true one which sans infatuation or attraction or whatever the term may be ) and ofcourse the stage when we land up in a job that one is passionate about, with some decent gross package to start a career with.


Now what is my point. The transformations in life I meant about lately not only change the persona,they include the changes in character underwent, behavioural changes towards others.Living a life that is mostly influenced by others or a life which is being forseen for the reputation that is to be gained.Be it in the dress we wear till the kind of attitude we depict.....This is always a good thing , taken in the sense of one's own development in his game of life.But did we do all these for the sake of getting better oneself in every way possible or just to prove a point to society that "I am good,capable or whatever to show off.."

My verdict , just ask yourself .."Is there any of mine in me now...or am I living the way I wish exactly I mean the way I want..?"

Ans : A BIG "NO", that most of us will have in their heart , some try not to reveal it.

So much of complications this little pretty life has .Trying had to fit into place that really does not suit...God..!!This mean thing of life trying not to show the real me in me really pisses me off these days.Personal Identity, is on the trail.

I am not sure if I made myself clear about my view .I just spilt off my frustrations about something that was kindling me for quite a while..

Have you fallen in love?




















Have you? If yes, then there's nothing unusual about you :D ... If No, WHAT!!?? Please tell me how??

Is it possible for someone to never fall in love with another person till they are wedded (considering wedding is the very act of connecting two lovers or prospective lovers)? I'm guessing it was quite possible in my gandpa's time (only guessing) but now, there's nobody in sight who has never fallen in love! Is it a good sign? I don't know... it's so weird. yeah, of course there's nothing wrong...

When I was very young, an 'affair' was a very bad word and whoever I knew never had one... so I thought. But now, being in an affair is like getting a monthly hair-cut. The new style looks good at first but then it's hair and it does grow and you come back to square one. Are you following this? err... whatever!

Divorce, extra-marital affairs, no strings attached, two-timing, ... I don't quite understand where I'm taking this to, but if you can really follow, you'll know it's all coming to one question - what exactly is love? - a feeling? a perception? remedy? a commitment? WHAT IS IT?

I'm confused now... because I wanted to convey something else but I ended up writing something else, and I don't want to discard this because I wrote whatever my mind dictated...

Bleh! Right, if you have never fallen in love with anybody till date , please contact me and I want to take your interview

Serious...